A workmanlike 2–1 over Six Offenders. Three points is three points.

On the scoresheet: James O (brace).

Man of the Match? No argument: James O. Worth the admission fee alone — Matt for nutmegging some guy. Filthy.

Every week needs a villain. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Eddie for missing a penalty. He'll want that one back.

The football was just the warm-up; The Cock Inn was the main event.