A workmanlike 2–1 over Fire in the Hogg. Three points is three points.

On the scoresheet: Jack C (brace).

Man of the Match? No argument: Dan H and Jack C. Worth the admission fee alone — Dan's through ball for Jack's second goal. All the striker had to do was nod.

Every week needs a villain. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Their keeper for randomly picking it up outside the area and giving us a penalty. He'll want that one back.

The football was just the warm-up; The Cock Inn was the main event.