A 4–0 battering of Crystal Phalace that'll be retold (and exaggerated) over several pints.

Names in the book: Harry P (brace), Maca and Milian.

Harry P ran the show and walked off with Man of the Match. Worth the admission fee alone — Charlie's backheel assist for Harry's nice finish. Served up on a plate.

Not a goal conceded; take a bow, Drew S.

Every week needs a villain. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Milian for his miss from the edge of the area with all the time in the world — that went into orbit. Someone go fetch it from the car park.

Another Tuesday in the books — see you at the bar.