Not pretty, but nobody's complaining: Horsed beat Wally FC 6–3.

Getting the goals: Ryan C (brace), Jack C (brace), Matt S and Ash S.

Pick of the bunch: Ryan C, your Man of the Match. Worth the admission fee alone — Jack and Ryan — Jack's headed through ball and Ryan finished it nicely. All the striker had to do was nod.

Every week needs a villain. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Matt and Ryan for poor choice of clothing items…. Ryan for choosing to wear a thick woollen top in a 30 degree heatwave and Matt for having no football boots so wore trainers. You can't tackle in those.

And with that, it was off to The Cock Inn to get horsed.