Horsed were rampant, putting 5 past BOMBACLATS in a 5–0 demolition.

On the scoresheet: Jack C (hat-trick), James O and Chris L.

Man of the Match? No argument: Chris L. File this under 'pure cinema' — Chris rolling the player and assisting Jack to slot home. Served up on a plate.

Not a goal conceded; take a bow, Dan H.

Predictably, someone had to spoil the fun. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Ash for the one time he touched the ball he tripped over it and fell on his £8k camera. Not the graceful exit he'd planned.

The football was just the warm-up; The Cock Inn was the main event.