Six Offenders edged it 0–1. Frustrating, but the pints don't pour themselves.

Not a single goal for Horsed. It happens.

Dan H took the MOTM honours, and the first round. One for the scrapbook — Adam's chest past their defender and Ash having an orgasm after seeing it. Touch of a centre-forward.

And now, the bit nobody volunteers for. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to James for lubing his nips and them still bleeding after the game.

Then, as is tradition, everyone got thoroughly horsed at The Cock Inn. 🐴🍺