A workmanlike 3–2 over Champagne SR. Three points is three points.

On the scoresheet: Jack C (brace) and James O.

Man of the Match? No argument: Jack C. Moment of the night — Chris's vision for his through ball for the first goal. Vision, genuinely.

Time for the weekly shame. This week's Donkey 🫏 goes to Matt for tickling the D by passing the ball to the edge of the D rather than to James, falling perfectly for their player. Gravity: still undefeated.

The football was just the warm-up; The Cock Inn was the main event.